The Day Just Keeps Getting Better
Well, I think this one is going to need a stitch or two.Walking into the emergency room at the Thunder Bay Regional Hospital, I quickly realize that the entire city is freaking out over the H1N1 virus.
I am greeted immediately at the Emergency doors, by people wearing masks, standing behind a table which is blockading the waiting area and reception desk. There is hand sanitizer sitting on every station and pamphlets outlining the symptoms of the "killer flu", which is bombarding our nation and city, to say the least. I guess I have been underestimating the seriousness of the swine flu.
"Have you had a cough in the past week, have you had a fever? Any flu-like symptoms in the past week?" she asks without pausing for my answer after each question. She gazes up at me from behind the table with her masked face, as the last question comes out. Oh, she is waiting for my answer to all three questions. Do I group the questions together and give one answer or do I answer each one individually? She is looking irritated and frustrated at me. I better hurry and answer her, either way.
"No," I say.
With a sigh of relief, she directs me to the line up which awaits the reception nurse.
" Please, use this hand sanitizer and wait for reception to let you know it is your turn"
"No problem."
Wow, I cannot even take my place in the line up. I have to wait here in fear that I might be getting to close to people? This is scary!
The waiting room is divided into two separate areas. One for people like me, who have had no flu symptoms and one area for all of the people wearing masks, who I assume must have the symptoms.
Has everyone forgotten that it is regular flu season, too? Why necessarily does every cough, sore throat or fever have to be swine flu? More people died last year from the seasonal flu than swine flu victims this year. Maybe, I am too calm. Of course, nothing can happen to me. I am invincible. As long as I wash my hands often and eat broccoli, yogurt, green vegetables, and squash to go along with plenty of rest, I should be o.kay, right?
"Next."
"These are scary times we are living in!"
"It is just a precaution, ma'am."
I look around and see that all of the staff are wearing protective masks and gloves. Two thirds of the patients are wearing masks and keeping their distance from fellow patients. This really is a cautious time, maybe even a bit paranoid. The room is quiet, in spite of the fact that the waiting room is overflowing with people.
I give her my story as to why I am here. She, too seems bothered that I am taking up their valuable time. Perhaps, I am using up time which should be made available to more deserving or more serious patients, suffering from H1N1 symptoms. Who knows!
I have a right to be here!
"How long do you figure until I can expect to be seen, I know that you can't tell me exactly, but approx...."
"Hurry up, Ma'am, we have people waiting. I can't tell you that"
"I know that you are busy, but I have a class starting in just over an hour, perhaps you can tell me about how..."
"I told you I do not know!
"I am sorry Miss, but I have a right to be here."
" And there are patients waiting to be signed in."
My face is burning up. I can feel the anxiety filling my body and I am about to explode. How rude, she will not even let me finish my thoughts! Besides the fact that I am in pain and bleeding all over the sleeve of my coat, I am staring at a bunch of blank, partial faces covered in protective wear, and that is starting to freak me out even more. I refuse! I am not going to get paranoid about this, so called pandemic, and I am surly not going to lose it on this woman!
"Is being a bitch a qualification that must be met before being hired to work in emergency? People here are sick or injured and do not need to be brushed off by an overpaid, lack of knowledge person like you with zero compassion and zero people skills!"
Opps. I think that I just lost it!
I am in shock that I just said that! She glances over to her co-worker and says, "This one is a real prize."
I just need to ignore this comment. I am a big person. I see no evil, hear no evil and will not take any further action in this conversation.
I came into this place with an owy that needs to be looked at and now, I am falling in to the fear that has been spread all over this room from what they call precautions. To me they are instilling fear in people about a virus that may or may not be as serious as they are predicting. Like with any virus, we need to be careful, wash hands, not touch our faces, gargle listerine, drink a few hot beverages everyday, and keep our nosrils clean. It is one thing to take precautions and it is another thing to spread fear through over-reaction! Dammit, I am just going to take my seat and hope for the best!
I have been called in. That was so fast!
"Wow, I am done already and 20 minutes to spare! I'm not going to be late. Maybe this wasn't such a bad visit!" If nothing else, it has been effective. Jaunting along, replaying my whole visit, I can tell myself that atleast I am not going to be late for school. Something going right. Where are my keys? "Oh," digging into my pocket, "here they are."
Oh no, are those my lights on? Um-Hmm!
I am so cold! That helicopter needs to fly away. It is so windy. The key unlocks the door and I jump into my jeep, barely being able to hear a thing from the noise of the chopper. I put the key in the ignition... and guess what, it is dead! I killed the battery. I hope this is not an indication as to what the swine flu really means!
I like the description of the Emergency room at the beginning. It captures the chaotic atmosphere and sets the stage nicely for your frustration. I like the internal struggle you express following the exchange with the nurse and your own surprise that you “lost it” when you just promised yourself you wouldn’t.
ReplyDeleteI think the blog would have more powerful if you had remained focused on the conversation and your feelings about it, instead of your feelings about the H1N1 frenzy. I found myself more interested in your experience within the frenzy than your sidebars about it. (Incidentally, as an employee of the hospital, I feel compelled to editorialize a bit and share that, as frustrating as the precautionary measures can be, they are in place for the protection not only of patients, but the community as a whole. If they weren’t in place, we would very likely see a significant increase in the spread of H1N1 and its consequences. Not that this serves to excuse nasty behaviour on the part of nurses!)
Now back to our regular programming … I thought your moment of doubt (“Of course, nothing can happen to me. I am invincible. As long as I wash my hands often and eat broccoli, yogurt, green vegetables, and squash to go along with plenty of rest, I should be o.kay, right?”) showed your vulnerability. This bit of second-guessing was refreshing and honest.
Although the dead battery in your car adds to the frustrations of the day, I didn’t think it added significantly to the blog. Again, for me, the real focus could have been on your personal experience within the Emergency and the struggle that occurs because you are in need of help and surround by, ironically, uncaring caregivers.
Hey,
ReplyDeleteI thought this was an interesting post, however I thought the message of it was sort of lost with all of the swine flu information -for example: "I look around and see that all of the staff are wearing protective masks and gloves. Two thirds of the patients are wearing masks and keeping their distance from fellow patients. This really is a cautious time, maybe even a bit paranoid. The room is quiet, in spite of the fact that the waiting room is overflowing with people." could have been completely taken out in order for you to move the story along faster - I personally don't think your story was about swine flu, but the affect the swine flu had on your condition.... and the treatment you got... why were you there?? I realise you were bleeding and thought you needed a few stitches, but what happened?? maybe outline how you got the cut and your [possible] dread of going to the emergency... I think you focused a little too much on the swine flu aspect and not enough on why you were actually there ...
otherwise i thought it was funny when you blew up on the reception lady/nurse - it sounded like she was a grumpy old lady (i would have liked to hear a bit of a discription of her... perhaps something like "this snaggle tooth'd old bat is clearly in a bad mood judging by the sneer on her face and her impatience..."
I do acree with Tracie about the car battery - although it was a good way to tie it into the piece and relate it to the swine flu, i also think it was un-needed.
Well done!
Hi Marquita, I liked your blog, and can see its potential! The "dammit" story is really what gets my curiosity too. You have told the story well, and bring the reader along with you on your visit. Can you email me? I think I might see a way to create a twist that you may want to explore. ywon@lakeheadu.ca
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work...way to go typing with one hand by the way ;)
Cheers,
Yuk-Sem
I am afraid that perhaps I did poor job on my post. My blog had very little to do with why I was at outpatients, but more to do with the realization that I came too while there. Tracie hit the nail right on the head when she said that I showed my vulnerability in the "I am invinible" moment(moment of doubt). Being at the hospital made me feel vulnerable to the virus. I came to a realization. As for the dying battery, that was my way of saying, "I hope I did not screw myself". The whole visit was frustrating and I became frustrated at the swine flu and all that it represents.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed this post and I also liked how you realized where in it you may have sent wrong. Never say that you did a poor job, because like Susan has said, drafts and editing are what makes writing so well.
ReplyDeleteI liked how you set your vulnerability. I too feel vulnerable in situations as such. The swine flu, to me , is way to talked about and I don't think it is necessary. People just need to chill out to be honest.
I think that the title could maybe be a bit more intriguing. Otherwise, good post.
Marquita,
ReplyDeleteI hate hate hate the hospital too. I hate all the waiting and then waiting more and more. Ugh. And I would love to lose it on the nurse that has given me SO MUCH attitude. But my mom is a nurse, and based on the stories that she gives me, I give them the benefit of the doubt. I think the story is strong; it captures the hospital atmosphere well. And your inner dialogue is humourous and relatable. Your setting is well described without being excessive. I think that it could be stronger if you spoke more to your experience in the hospital and exclude the last bit about your car being dead. Your interaction with the nurses are tryingly polite and they aren’t caring at all; it’s a place we have all been in in one way or another. Also, consider the five senses when describing: people talk about hospitals having a smell, what would that be? Etc. Otherwise, good stuff.